If you need support with issues around grief and loss, contact our Emotional Support Team now 01206 368 420 option 2 [email protected]
Have you lost a loved one?
If you’re reading this now, sadly it is very possible that someone close to you has died. Maybe this was in the past few days. Perhaps it was a year ago but still feels like yesterday.
Immediately after someone dies there can be a lot of activity and you might feel like you don’t even have the time to stop and think about how you feel. You can go through a range of feelings: shock, sadness, anger, fear, confusion, depression, even numbness to name a few.
Do you feel lost?
Experiencing such a wide range of feelings can be really confusing and you might feel overwhelmed. Talking with someone who has training or experience in bereavement and grief can help you to organise your thoughts. This might help you feel more able to cope with those overwhelming feelings and sense of confusion.
Who can you turn to?
Sometimes people mean well and have the best intentions but what they say does not help and can possibly leave you feeling even more sad or lonely. Sometimes people feel awkward about getting it wrong and so they don’t say anything at all. You might also find yourself reacting strongly to some of the things people say- then feeling bad afterwards.
You’re not alone
You might think that you have moved on a bit, only to see, hear or read something which brings back a memory and takes you right back into a place of feeling down and alone again. Does this sound familiar? You are not alone to feel this way. Let’s repeat that. You are not alone in feeling like this. A huge change has taken place in your life and you are going through a process of adjustment. You are not alone.
Change can be difficult
Especially if you feel like you didn’t ‘choose’ this. It is said that you can do something as little as three times before it can become a habit. If you spent years of your life with your loved one, sharing dreams and memories you aren’t likely to ‘get over it’ in a matter of minutes.
Do you need support?
You might need different kinds of support at different times. Maybe in the early days you need help with practical things like organising a funeral. When the initial shock is over, you might need information on how to manage certain aspects of life which your loved one organised before.
You might feel worried that you aren’t very good company because you feel sad. Maybe you don’t feel like you have anything new or interesting to say in conversations with old friends. When people talk about what has been happening you might feel like others are moving on and things are changing in their lives, but you aren’t. You might realise that you need someone to talk to.
Do you need to talk?
If you’ve realised that you are feeling lonely and thinking that it might help to just have some time with someone who can listen, get in touch.
Our emotional support are here to offer gentle caring support. We can talk things through with you in lots of different ways- by phone, video call, email and webchat.
If you feel like you need some extra support for a while, we can connect you with one of our special Bereavement Support Volunteers.
Bereavement Support Volunteers
Your Bereavement Support Volunteer will arrange to contact you once a week for a few weeks. They will arrange a convenient time to offer you a space to talk- to review how your week has been, how you feel and if you need any extra help.
Your volunteer will talk to us regularly and let us know if you need directing to other information and services. We will then help to coordinate that for you.
Our services are free- you don’t need to do a thing except take the first step and let us know you want support.
Does someone else need support?
Life has changed a lot recently and services are working differently. Families aren’t all able to be together and are having to deal with really complicated circumstances around those they love who are not well right now.
Do you need information?
Services are operating differently and that can add stress and anxiety to an already distressing time. Whether you are trying to visit a loved one in hospital or need help saying goodbye, we are here to help.
Do you want to help?
Maybe you haven’t experienced a personal bereavement recently but you’re worried about someone who has and want to help. It has been hard to avoid news about people dying.
To find out more about becoming a volunteer contact 01206 368 420 option 2 [email protected]
We have created our own ‘Dear Departed…’ page as a place to help us come together in sharing thoughts, feelings, and memories – and perhaps gently support one another to feel less alone in times of need.
On the page we have shared thoughts to those who we love along with quotes and poems which we find helpful in the hope that you might also find a sense of connection and peace here. Some quotes might speak to you. Perhaps there is a particular poem or saying which helped you at a difficult time?
Connecting to a group or cause can be a great source of support when you feel alone. Maybe your wellbeing is so not good right now because of an experience of end of life or loss as you are reading this?